Heart Confusion

I'll catch everybody up on Boyce in a few days. I just had to write about this to maybe clear my heart and mind about it.

Have you ever had to humble yourself? I did this week and it was hard, unbelievably hard. I was accused some time back as being 'PROUD' It took me many long hard years to feel proud of myself. but apparently it's a bad thing: to be proud. It is extremely hard for me to ask for help. any kind of help But this week, I was telling a lady that I worked with about 15 years ago and we see each other at Wal-Mart when she shops fairly often and chitchat while she's there, but not really a friend, about what a rough time we are having. I was off for 2 months taking care of Boyce while he had his shock therapy and obviously wasn't getting paid for it. I even dropped my health insurance, because I knew I wouldn't be able to pay the premiums, but when I came back to work, they dunned my check. Well, come to find out, I have to pay my premiums until the first of the year and then it drops. So I worked last week and this week for free. I was so upset, because we only had $173.00 in the bank, still have a pile of bills, and no expectation of any money coming in. So I was telling her about it. And she casually said "I have a hundred dollar bill that you can have" and I said 'No, I couldn't do that' so we hugged and I thanked her for the thought, went back to work and she went on her way. Five minutes later, she came back with tears in her eyes and said "God told me that I can't leave Wal-Mart until I give this to you. I'll just blow it and you really need it. I can't go unless you take this. So I took it and just bawled like a baby. I had to leave the store and go outside to cry. God is awesome and Robin must have been his angel that night. But it changed my spirit. humbling myself and I know God wants us to be humble, but it was so so hard. life changing really